Today is no different from any day.. Same old same old.. the nostalgic sickness.. the immsense hurt in the torn bits and peices of my heart.. !! Nothing to do , nothing to say ..Nothing to do at all..
Though tedious routine keeps me busy with all the "Not SO" important things..same old monotony.. tiresome , wearisome, dull, deadly, dreary, humdrum, noxious, draining & mind numbing .. MEMORIES .. !
The fatal thoughts catch me unaware YEt again .. well .. Sorry and so ExCuse me for Bein Human !!
Words .. uff your words RING in my Head Still .. starting From friendliness to ingenuousness to closeness to sincerity to love to devotion to Promises .. Damn .. The GODAMN Promises!!
Finally ending with your remoteness , Coldness , distance ,Carelessness .. resulting into My solitute ,HeartBreak ,PAIN , Suffering, segregation, Cursing .. No I AM NOT DYING !!!! But its like FALLING OFF A CLIFF.... In SLOW MOTION ...NOt knowing when I will hit the bottom !!
My brain is filled up with all your words (good and bad ).. perfectly preserved .. like vocabulary in a Dictionary.. your laughter even.. words you asked that begger to say ! yes that still makes me smile despite how bad u hurt me ! i have been everywhere with you even while i wasnt with you... today i went past that place where i saw you for the first time., seems like centuries ago. but memories flooded back instantly .. like they always do .. 22 hours of the day out of the 24 ! and i was once again engulfed with the unbearable pain of the unbearable past !
You used to go insane if i was hurt or disturbed .. was it Really You ?? or another Time or maybe another Place !!?? Now U tell me that " I need to get a grip on myself cuz i am talking to
walls" Right ? WELL u know wat .. Walls still have the ability to penetrate Sound
or Voice .. So i'm not really talking to walls here.. I am Talking to A big boulder
of Stone..incapable of hearing ....Walls are man made maybe thats why they still
hold a bit of softness despite being Concrete .. But Stone is nature made .. Hard to
Break !
And "ONLY" was the word you used.. Yes It was .. Everything was an "empty ONLY" to you .. I know.. but as i said before It Sure as hell wasnt an "only" for me !!! Boy U sure have a Power of Superman to get over something like that !
Oh GO on .. LIVE yr Life ... !! Travel , Go to the damn movies with your friends .. & have JUST PLAIN fun .. FUN .. IN YOUR EMPTY world ..... as I suffer in MINE ...
But Still everyday is a Constant War in my mind i Face .. Whether The pain caused is By Loving U OR Hating You .. and still havent been able to Infilterate anything Final...
SO...
YES I LOVE U ... still u doh doh !!
But then again ..
I HATE YOU more than anyone & anything ...
But i guess I love you more .. Most of the times...
But Right Now...
I Really Really HATE you...... !!!
Though tedious routine keeps me busy with all the "Not SO" important things..same old monotony.. tiresome , wearisome, dull, deadly, dreary, humdrum, noxious, draining & mind numbing .. MEMORIES .. !
The fatal thoughts catch me unaware YEt again .. well .. Sorry and so ExCuse me for Bein Human !!
Words .. uff your words RING in my Head Still .. starting From friendliness to ingenuousness to closeness to sincerity to love to devotion to Promises .. Damn .. The GODAMN Promises!!
Finally ending with your remoteness , Coldness , distance ,Carelessness .. resulting into My solitute ,HeartBreak ,PAIN , Suffering, segregation, Cursing .. No I AM NOT DYING !!!! But its like FALLING OFF A CLIFF.... In SLOW MOTION ...NOt knowing when I will hit the bottom !!
My brain is filled up with all your words (good and bad ).. perfectly preserved .. like vocabulary in a Dictionary.. your laughter even.. words you asked that begger to say ! yes that still makes me smile despite how bad u hurt me ! i have been everywhere with you even while i wasnt with you... today i went past that place where i saw you for the first time., seems like centuries ago. but memories flooded back instantly .. like they always do .. 22 hours of the day out of the 24 ! and i was once again engulfed with the unbearable pain of the unbearable past !
You used to go insane if i was hurt or disturbed .. was it Really You ?? or another Time or maybe another Place !!?? Now U tell me that " I need to get a grip on myself cuz i am talking to
walls" Right ? WELL u know wat .. Walls still have the ability to penetrate Sound
or Voice .. So i'm not really talking to walls here.. I am Talking to A big boulder
of Stone..incapable of hearing ....Walls are man made maybe thats why they still
hold a bit of softness despite being Concrete .. But Stone is nature made .. Hard to
Break !
And "ONLY" was the word you used.. Yes It was .. Everything was an "empty ONLY" to you .. I know.. but as i said before It Sure as hell wasnt an "only" for me !!! Boy U sure have a Power of Superman to get over something like that !
Oh GO on .. LIVE yr Life ... !! Travel , Go to the damn movies with your friends .. & have JUST PLAIN fun .. FUN .. IN YOUR EMPTY world ..... as I suffer in MINE ...
But Still everyday is a Constant War in my mind i Face .. Whether The pain caused is By Loving U OR Hating You .. and still havent been able to Infilterate anything Final...
SO...
YES I LOVE U ... still u doh doh !!
But then again ..
I HATE YOU more than anyone & anything ...
But i guess I love you more .. Most of the times...
But Right Now...
I Really Really HATE you...... !!!
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